Why cook when you can create? :P

I was bored so I decided to make corn fritters. They were quite yummy I have to say and it's really simple as well. I think for every free day I have in Melbourne, I'm going to try a new dish. I want to attempt cereal prawns next, just that I can't seem to find curry leaves here in Melbourne..

And it kinda annoys me that the picture is not really in focus, except for that ONE tiny piece of corn -.- But oh well, I shall practice photography more then.

Happy Birthday Gerald!!

Lim, Lee, Loo

Remember when we tried to be exclusive and said that only people whose surname started with L was cool?

Haha can't believe I found this photo - evidence that we did the weirdest stuff together (: But anyway, I digress. Since I won't be able to be in Singapore to help scheme another one of your birthdays or attempt to blind fold you or get the hair dresser to style your hair in the whackiest way possible, you shall be given a blog post.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BESTIE!! You're finally 19 and WE ARE NOT OLD!

Can't believe we've been talking for 7 years. Hopefully 70 years down the road we will still be talking and laughing (over the same kind of crap) and staying as far from the mental institution as possible.

:D

Christmas isn't Christmas

This Christmas is different; not particularly good or bad, just different.

So while a million and one thoughts run through my mind, MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE (:

Doesn't my cake look pretty? It's supposed to be a two layered red velvet cake with orange cream cheese frosting with berries, but the top layer kinda blocked off the second layer (which probably doesn't have enough icing). But anyhow.. PRETTY RIGHT? Haha. Hope it tastes nice.

Simple Pleasures(:

Those were the days - whereby a simple thing like face painting made you feel like a princess.

6am

The thought of waking up at 6am is kinda blegh.. Reminds me of secondary school days. It's kinda amazing how I managed to get ready in such a short time actually.

But hmm maybe I'm just lazy.. haha. Totally dreading waking up early, but I guess I got to befriend coffee once again.

Bubbles! :D

Today I bought bubbles; went to the backyard, standing under the stars and blew bubbles(: it was the happiest I've felt in a long while(:

I think I'm going to buy more since it's so cheap now. Haha. Someone play with me!!

you give me nightmares

Bad memories of my past is back to haunt me

It's bad because I'm paralysed with fear

I'm now caught in a dilemma

Long holidays are never going to be the same again:(

It kinda just hit me that

I'm 19

I'm going to graduate next year (2011)

and, I don't even know where else to begin...

But more importantly, it kinda hit me hard on how I'm not a kid anymore :( Grr, I'm like quite stressed out now that I can't even pen down my thoughts. SIGH.

Life is good because God is good(:

I suddenly remembered the first day of the year, while waiting for the sunrise we sat by the beach and just listened to the waves. I remember that as the waves crashed upon the shores that I felt God saying to me that He would ALWAYS be faithful to me, even when I doubted or even when I couldn't feel His presence. The song Your Name by Paul Baloche kept playing in my head as I, at that moment, came up with a new year resolution to do whatever it takes to be a good cell leader. I remember starting the year excited and yet somewhat nervous/scared.

It's now the 2nd of November. Time has seriously flown by and God has really been so faithful to me. I don't think I would have survived this year if not for Him. Even today (or technically, yesterday), when I was so nervous about coffee ministry, He showed me how He has everything under control and things worked out so well(: Cell leading was just pure awesome and definitely super rewarding. It's not yet the end of the year and many more things can happen in these 2 months - but I could not have asked for a better 2010.

That's why life is good - because God is good(:

*Big big smile and do happy dance*

Forgiveness

Today's sermon about forgiveness was an interesting one. It really made me rethink certain stuff and I think the 6 points that the pastor ended with is really worth sharing.

1. To remain resentful and harmful is my choice
2. To forgive is my need
3. We must always forgive but we cannot always forget
4. We must always forgive but we may nto always restore relationships
5. The wound (pain) will heal but the scars remain
6. To forgive is to let go - to release the offender from the bondage of hatred and retribution

Here today and gone tomorrow

The rain killed the pretty flower :(

But it made me realise - that's us (referring to picture above). Our time on earth is so limited and yet we sometimes act as if we'll live forever. It's really something to think about. And I'm too lazy to finish the rest of this post. Haha. So the end.

Lemon Meringue Cupcakes

I made Lemon Meringue Cupcakes today!! Quite exciting, since I always wanted to try out the recipe. So despite my not so good photography skills and bad piping for the meringue, the cupcake was really yummy! Haha yay!




So now back to the books. sigh.

Flower quickly fading

Not because of who I am, but because of what You've done

Not because of what I've done, but because of who You are

I feel my brain trying to divide itself into a few parts just so that I can cope with this craziness. I have post-its everywhere reminding me of the different things I need to do. Everything seems to be falling apart.

While I'm trying to conquer this mountain, I hear the Bible screaming out to me, reminding me of His faithfulness; reminding me that I don't have to do this on my own, in fact I shouldn't be.

*deep breath and then smile*

And thank you all for the encouraging verses and prayers. (you guys know who you are)

Teehee

(:

Hehe, I think he's cool and funny, at times.

♥

I totally understand

"I'm thankful for my years spent with this family; for everything we've shared, every chance we had to grow. I'll take the best of them with me and lead by their example wherever I go. A friend told me to be honest with you, so here it goes: This isn't what I want but I'll take the highroad. Maybe it's because I look at everything as a lesson or because I don't want to walk around angry. Or maybe it's because I finally understand. There are things we don't want to happen, but have to accept. Things we don't want to know, but have to learn. And people we can't live without, but have to let go."

JJ, Criminal Minds

Find us faithful

Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful

May the fire of our devotions light their way

May the footprints that we leave lead them to believe

And the lives we lived inspired them to obey

Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful

I can't believe this year is coming to an end. It's really bittersweet, and at the moment, a little more emphasise on the "bitter". And as much as I would love to elaborate on it, I can't bring myself to do so. Because words are simply not enough.

But whatever it is, even if I have to leave, I really...

Have we not learned that I resist change, A LOT.

I remember back in secondary school, how I would kill just to get to go for the new year's countdown, or how I would beg to be able to go for camps and whatnot. I remembered birthdays was a time when we get to go out and eat nice food as a family and Christmas/Chinese New Year was a time of awesome yummy food and presents/hongbaos.

At the beginning of the year, I remembered looking forward to spending Christmas like how we always did. With the whole family, with the gift exchanges. I liked how on those occasions, no matter what, family came first. I remembered being eager for another countdown. Where we will all stay up all night and dragging our feet home the next day.

Because certain things are really meant to be the same. That's what traditions are for, isn't it? Because if not, it just wouldn't feel right.

That's why it sucks so badly when these traditions have to be broken. And this decision I have to make sucks so badly as well.

I'm a sentimental person okay. Stop judging me.

Caged

The purpose of a prison is to punish, to protect and to rehabilitate. But do we, as a society, really assist in the rehabilitation process? I think one of the greater torture we can bestow on someone is to lock them up, give them the freedom after they served their time, not help them reintegrate into society and then, lock them back up again.

I'm looking forward to the day, when I can look back and understand why things have to work in a certain way.

Lightroom

I've discovered the photo editing software Lightroom and I did the above picture just for fun. (ok I knew about it long ago, just that I decided to try it out) It's quite cool to watermark my photo even though like it's not a professional shot or anything. Hehe, so after exams I'm going to entertain myself with learning how to use this software.

Hmmm

Studying criminology makes me wonder:

• if we are giving the police too much power
• if Taser Guns are really a good thing (do the pros really outweigh the cons, or are we allowing it just because it's a way that allows police to get some non lethal action on a more regular basis?)
• if we are letting off corrupted police/law enforcers too easily
• if we ever treat criminals like humans
• if we really considered how the families of 'criminals' feel
• if prisons are necessarily a good thing
• if anything is being done to improve the whole criminal justice system

and much much more. Hmm. Maybe I should do honours in Criminology instead...

Till then;

I really feel like I cannot cope with everything that is going on; I'm seriously overwhelmed right now. I'm super stressed out and I'm afraid I break down and give up even before the end of the sem. But I'm still alive, still trusting, still depending. Work progress today was good (justifies my going out later)

But yes. I'm probably going to 'disappear' for a bit, but I'll probably still be contactable, appearing online only when I feel like it. Because I need that space, I need to be able to reply emails at my own time, my own pace. I need to believe that there's more to my life than just uni and OCF. I need to know that when I step away from all technology, it's just me and God.

I need space to just breathe.

So, till then.

♥

Snuggling our toes into the sand; wind blowing our hair; sun beating down on us; constantly looking out for 'intruders'...

We need more times like these(:

(I don't know the title)

I will seek to bring Your name glory

I will seek to bring Your name honour

I will seek to magnify Your name in everything I do

Giving all the glory unto You

Jesus, Jesus

Jesus, Wonderful Name

Jesus, Jesus

Most exalted Name

I will bow before Your throne, Jesus

I will kneel down at Your feet in worship

I will bow before Your holy throne in everything I do

Giving all the glory unto You

New Season

I like how the weeds are prettier during Spring.

On another note, workload is piling up and all I want to do is sleep. Oh and how I really want to watch a movie. Anyone out there who wants to watch a movie with me?

Many thoughts

We are fortunate, but we don't realise it because we compare with people who have more, not with people who have less. Criminal minds make me sad, because the perpetrators usually have a sad history; it makes me wonder what can be done. I get grumpy when I'm feeling exhausted but I'm unable to fall asleep. Is it fair to say that all perpetrators are actually victims in their own rights? Why are we so quick to notice point out the flaws of others and yet so slow to sing their praises? I feel like playing my guitar. How come (back then) the whites were considered more superior to the blacks? I'm not feeling well:( I want to roll around in the grass. I miss my iPod. Do you think there'll ever be a time that we're truly contented with what we have? The flowers I received last week still look so pretty. And...

Drivinggg

I can't wait to get my driving license and it'll benefit my parents also when I get my license.

But I'm so like nervous for the test. I'm afraid that:

• I cannot slow down and maintain the 40km/h when necessary.
• I forget to stop at a stop sign.
• I change lanes on a solid (non-dotted) line
• I forget to check for blind spot
• I forget to check my mirrors when stepping on the break/when I hit my indicators

So basically, I'm afraid I do something stupid that will cause me to fail. But yes, I guess that's something to worry about later. Now time to grab my white-board marker and start listing my to-do's. (and I thought I was going to be 'free-er' this month...)

I'm still a child(:

Hehe. Crayons make me happy(:

Moving on

"We cross our bridges when we come to them and burn them behind us, with nothing to show for our progress except a memory of the smell of smoke, and a presumption that once our eyes watered."

Tom Stoppard

Flip the pages

It's the start of a new era, a new chapter.

I'm excited because I have big dreams.

On a totally random note: in Acts 2:17, it says "... your sons and daughters will prophesy, your young men will see visions, your old men will dream dreams." So if I'm dreaming dreams, does that mean I'm old? haha. Ok sorry, that was nonsense, don't listen to me.

*back to seriousness*

Yet at the same time, I'm horrified/terrified, because I'm going to have to step out of my comfort zone and enter something familiar yet totally different.

Ah well. But I guess it'll be like really interesting to see how God is going to use me in this next chapter of my life.

.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm just doing these all wrong.

In every season

Spring is coming!!

This is MY God.

Today I looked up to the sky and I saw an interesting mixture of clouds. I don't know how to describe it and because I was in the bus, I couldn't take a photo of it. But somehow, looking up to the heavens, I was reminded of that one thing;

That Jesus was going to come back.

At that time I was happy, I was relived, because that's the God I serve. The God I believe in is alive, the God I believe in WILL come back again. But then, it suddenly hit me again on how because we don't know exactly when He will return, how we should be living everyday as if it was our last. In other words, I felt that sense of urgency again. People need to know about Jesus NOW.

But then, I felt a bit lost, because I didn't know what to do, I didn't know where to start. My heart was/is breaking, because even some loved ones have not accepted Christ yet. But I guess, that's the thing. If I keep waiting for that moment to start, or for that grand plan to save the world, I may never get about doing it. I guess it starts right here, right now; with that conscious effort to live my life as a testimony; to use every opportunity to share the gospel.

I believe that my God is real, I believe He is coming back and I believe that He can use me to claim back souls.

Grateful for even the tiniest things(:

I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

Psalms 139:14

Reflections

I have a new fascination with reflections (and apparently bare trees as well) and since I've made the effort to locate my memory card reader, I thought I'll like show me pictures.

Humility

I saw this on C's blog and because I totally agree and it gave me that warm fuzzy feeling, I'm going to copy and paste it. Haha.

I saw this guy standing in the front - trying hard to control his emotions as he spoke to us, but stripped down and in complete honesty before God. And that is the real deal. He reminded us/me to run to God, not only in our times of trouble, but in our times of success. He challenged us/me to stretch our trust in God and exercise our faith, because GOD IS GOOD. He asked us/me if we have been praying for salvation. He showed us/me that being real with God is all that matters.

I saw his brothers alongside him offering support, prayer, encouragement and drive as he shared. Praying for him before the cue, standing with him as he stood, affirming him while he spoke and encouraging him at the end. They reminded me of people I know who would have done the same. They challenged me to be that person for someone new.

That's the kind of man I'd like; that's the kind of friend I'd want to be.

It's humbling.

Every Moment Counts

There was a shooting in Melbourne yesterday, along Lygon St. 2 people died, both aged between 60-70.

What's happening to the world? Is it really an increase in (violent) crime or just an increase knowledge/reporting of it?

I tried to put myself into the victims' families' shoes. The shock that they beloved has just passed away. The grief that will soon follow. All the regrets for the things that they've said or even for the they things they haven't said. The hatred that will fill their hearts towards that gunman. The anger that will consume them. At times like this, how do you bring yourself to forgive so readily?

Like what YS said, every moment counts. Every day that goes by is one less day for us to be praying for the unsaved, to be reaching out to those who have yet to hear the good news. What are we doing about that? And not only that, but if our hearts are not right before God, we will be answerable to it as well. How about the grudges that we've been holding? Are we able to let go and forgive?

Every moment counts and we should start living a life that matters, that makes a difference, a life that is right before God. And importantly, we shouldn't be fooled by the devil that there is time. There isn't.

Blegh

I'm so frustrated, stressed and overwhelmed.

I am making NO progress on my essay because it's just pure impossible to do the research with no proper articles to be found. On top of that, I'm starting to lag behind in my weekly readings and my to-do lists is just getting longer and longer. BLEGH.

Random Thoughts

It's actually quite depressing to have night classes, or classes that end after the sun has set. Especially if you have to travel home alone, and worst, to an empty house.

I'm grateful that my family is here. I really am.

Deeper

I want to know You, I want to hear Your voice

I want to feel You, more than before

I want to touch You, I want to see Your face

I want You Jesus, more than before

More of You, Jesus I want more

More of You my Lord

Take me deeper than I've been before

Take me further God I long for more

Take me higher than I've been before

Jesus I want more

Jesus I need more

More of You, more of You Jesus

More of You, I need more of You

Run Your Own Race

Stop comparing

Time Heals

It has been said, "time heals all wounds." I do not agree. The wound remains. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissues and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.

Rose Kennedy (1890-1995)

Just because..

I'm blogging for the sake of blogging and having a new post up on my blog. (so warning: it's probably going to be random stuff)

Time is flying by so quickly. I've just ended my second week of my second sem of my second year in uni. This time next year, I'll be handling stuff like application for postgrad, hopefully being sure of what I want to do with my life and stuff like that. I guess it's scary in the sense that, once I leave the shelter of being a student, I have to face the harsh reality of life in the working place. I think no amount of part time jobs can truly prepare you for that day. But that's not the point (for now). The point is, it's like I'm growing up so fast and it's kinda scary.

And there's so many things happening at the same time; sometimes it becomes too much and I feel like I'm going to burn out (and it's only week 2!) But yeah. I guess I have this weird habit of like 'looking into the future' and then scaring myself with the amount of to-dos.

Ah well. That's my random post for the day. Haha.

COFFEE

On the plus side, because I don't really drink coffee that often, it really helps me stay awake.

On the down side, I get super hyper and restless, and all I want to do is move about, walk, jump and run. Hahaha.

I'M HYPER NOWWW.

Needs vs Wants

I think life was easier when I stayed alone because I could be selfish and it didn't matter.

Suddenly I feel very conflicted with my wants, my needs, my responsibilities/commitments, my conscience...

I think I'm going to start writing down pros and cons.

Sem 2 is starting

The to-do list is getting longer and longer. But it doesn't seem annoying because I really love doing them. More importantly, I love the people I'm doing these for.

I think I'll be quite sad once this year is over.

YAY

FREEDOM!!!!!

I feel so relieved and happy. This has to be the longest sem I had so far and I'm so thankful it's over! SO HAPPYYY(:(:

Past vs Present

As part of my procrastination ritual, I started reading the pioneer posts of a few people's blogs. It's SO CUTE to compare the person back then and the person now; to get amused at the little things that changed and giggle at the other things that remain the same. And then the inevitable comparing, of how their lives reflect bits of my life as well, or in some cases, how we are different.

Ah well. Back to studying. I'll continue my stalking investigating after exams tomorrow. Freedom is so close I can almost taste it!

Penning down random thoughts

I'm blessed. We are all, really. And yet we take so many things for granted.

Forgiveness and mercy. Without them, we as imperfect people, will probably always be on the run; hiding from those who claim to have not broken a single rule. And we not only take it for granted, but we don't pass it on to others. Freely we have received, and yet not freely we give. To those who have sinned against us, we hold grudges, we plan our revenge. At the given opportunity, we probably would rather execute our vengeance because it would be so much harder to let everything go and just forgive.

Freedom. I've never realised how fortunate I am to not worry about the police, to have to constantly be in hiding. It's really a blessing to be in a country that is not facing wars, where only harmless strikes parade down the street, where I can breathe in the fresh air as and when I please.

Simple things we take for granted and these things can be so easily taken away. I marvel at the fact that God loves us so much, that He gave us free will. To the people who are undeserving, He gave us a place to live and we totally wrecked it. Yet He still calls out to us - calling us home.

With unfathomable grace and mercy, He forgives us. With unmeasurable love, He gave us a second chance through His Son's death and resurrection. With utmost patience, He's waiting for us to come home.

My plan to be MIA

There's probably a whole long list of people I miss and a longer list of things I want to do (instead of studying and the endless assignments). I also probably have a thousand and one stories to share.

But for now, please pardon my antisocial-ness because I am highly stressed and my short attention span, plus huge need for procrastination, isn't helping.

Precious Memories(:

I miss mghandbells.

I miss the many performances we had, the many opportunities that we had to turn down (because holidays like Christmas was too important to us. haha), the skill of putting on make up on the bumpy bus rides, the skill of running around in court shoes, pushing the trolley of bells with Tiffany!!

But it's more than that. I miss the different pieces we played and how Mrs Aw really taught me how to perform a piece and really appreciate the music/dynamics. I miss the outings we had after we left, level by level. I miss working so hard with them to perfect a piece. I miss the late night practices. (I miss the 'punctuality speeches') More importantly, I miss belonging to a group with a bunch of awesome people who share the same passion for handbells, for music; who also shared the same faith, where we pray together before practice started and when it ended.

I can still remember my last major performance, how the last song was 'Give Thanks' and my conductor joked about the seniors crying in that song to make it more dramatic. But I guess, there is really a lot to give thanks about; just being part of it was amazing. Oh how I really want to perform just one more time..

Best homecell...

With the most awesome cell ever!!! I'm truly grateful for each and everyone of my members. Also, I'm so proud to be leading a cell of really sporting people, each unique in their own ways.

(Look at Joel, the guy with the balloons.)

I guess through this cell, God has really teaching me so much more about Himself; the biggest lesson is that if I'm willing to decrease and let Him take charge, that He will increase and bless me till my cup overflows.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

⁹But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. ¹⁰That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

I love my awesome cell and the many things I'm learning from God through them(:

Melbourne's Weather

I like it how when I personify the weather in Melbourne, I just end up giggling to myself. In a way, it really reminds me of myself and if I was in charge of the weather in any particular place, it probably would be something like Melbourne's. Hahaha. Like how the change is not gradual, but sudden and abrupt, as it tries to catch its deadline (of when to be cold or hot).

And yet this is the kind of 'joke' that when you tell people they give you the -.- face and say 'okayyyy...'

But whatever it is, I'm glad to be in the country where you can experience all four seasons in a day and where the weather forecast is rarely right. It just makes life so much more interesting(:

MG

Today made me realise how much I miss being in a Christian school.

I had a group presentation today and as my group members and I were waiting for tute to start, the first thing that popped into my mind was that we should like pray before the presentation began. I don't know if they are Christians or not, but it's really simple things like this that makes me miss mg so much.

I really miss how we could just pray together before exam began, before doing really anything. I miss the different cliques all sitting together, holding hands and praying. It was cool you know, to be united as friends and also as fellow believers.

If I stay in Singapore, I'm sending my daughter to mg.

Personal prayer for wisdom

"Now, O Lord my God, you have made your servant king in place of my father David. But I am only a little child and do not know how to carry out my duties. Your servant is here among the people you have chosen, a great people, too numerous to count or number.

So give your servant a discerning heart to govern your people and to distinguish between right and wrong.

For who is able to govern this great people of yours?"

1 Kings 3:7-9

You Are Beautiful (:

To all the insecure souls out there; to all those who needs to be loved; to all those who need a hug.

To all those who needs to be told 'you are beautiful'...

Every day is so wonderful

And suddenly it's hard to breathe

Now and then I get insecure

From all the pain, feel so ashamed

I am beautiful no matter what they say

Words can't bring me down

I am beautiful in every single way

Yes, words can't bring me down, oh no

So don't you bring me down today

To all your friends you're delirious

So consumed in all your doom

Tryin' hard to fill the emptiness, the piece is gone

Left the puzzle undone, ain't that the way it is?

'Cause you are beautiful no matter what they say

Words can't bring you down, oh no

You are beautiful in every single way

Yes, words can't bring you down, oh no

So don't you bring me down today

No matter what we do

No matter what we do

(No matter what we do)

No matter what we say

(We're the song that's outta tune)

(Full of beautiful mistakes)

(And everywhere we go)

And everywhere we go

(The sun will always shine)

The sun will always, always shine!

(But tomorrow we might awake on the other side)

'Cause you are beautiful no matter what they say

Yes, words won't bring us down, oh no

We are beautiful in every single way

Yes, words can't bring us down, oh no

So don't you bring me down today

Don't you bring me down today

Don't you bring me down today

The kind of Faith I want to have

Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to the king, "O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are throw into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king.

But even if he does not,

we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up."

Daniel 3: 16-18

Read the whole story here.

One Body One Voice

Haha TOC. Remember these? Oh man. We were really super duper close at that time. Kinda miss those BBQs and jamming sessions and random planning of events...

Most importantly, I really miss you guys.

Good times(: If only we could relive them. But for now, they'll remain precious precious memories.

One word:

Nostalgic

Easter Camp '10

#1 (I'm going to miss you three when you leave)

#2 mg girls

#3 Laska (Easter camp cell)

#4 OCF cell

This Easter Camp was different from the past 2. Perhaps it was because I am no longer at the stage whereby I'm trying to find a crowd to fit in. Perhaps it is because I finally feel like I belong to this family. But whatever it was, it was a good-different.

Last time, whenever I think about that Cross and Jesus' death at Calvary, I am reminded of suffering, of how we are wicked and undeserving. I am reminded of the pain that Jesus went through. Back then, the picture in my mind was always rather gloomy. But this Easter, whenever I picture the cross, I am reminded of beauty. It's actually really so beautiful and words cannot begin to describe what I feel. I am now reminded of grace, of God's wonderful master plan. I am reminded of God's perfect love for us. It's really so so beautiful.

I guess this Easter Camp was different because it made me so happy to see people stepping up; because it made me cry when my [new] cell members pulled Kim and I aside to pray for us; because I knew God was working through people; because God provided for my emotional needs...

Most importantly, this Easter Camp was because I left without feeling some sort of a high, but instead a renewed love for my God, my Saviour, my Friend.

Losing the battle but winning the war

After weeks of 'fighting' with my sore throat, I think my body is giving in. Now I'm sneezing way too often and my eyes are starting to get teary - signs that I'm falling sick(er).

NOOOOOO.. Not 2 days before Easter Camp.

But never mind. After I wake up, I expect all the sickness to be gone. (I don't care! It had better go away)

I miss those times..

when your hair was short;

when you were rather socially awkward;

when you would run to get help each time I hurt myself;

when you missed me and wanted to talk to me;

when you always intended to protect me, even from afar.

Overwhelmed

It's very sad when I'm so excited for my one week break just so that I can catch up with my work and readings, and of course to complete assignments that are due the week after.

But other than that, the upcoming Easter camp promises to be good. So I guess that's something to look forward to.

BLAH

Tuesday (30 March) - Criminology class test, worth 20%

Wednesday (31 March) - Psych lab proposal (1500 words), worth 15%

Thursday (1 April) - Psych online test, worth 2.5%

And I cannot focus!!! I'm more or less prepared for my test but other than that, my mind keeps wandering.. I anticipate sleepless nights (tonight and tomorrow night) if I keep getting distracted by every single thing. GAH. And it's not that it's very difficult, it's just that me and my short attention span is...

Joseph And The Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat

And so because I found the "Joseph And The Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat" CD, I've been playing it over and over and over. I simply LOVE that musical. First one I watched and rewatched and rewatched... Ok but before I get carried away..

(Basically it's a musical based on a bible story of Joseph. Found here) It's amazing how even for a situation that so filled with hatred and so much sin, that God used it to bring so much glory to His name. A boy sold to be a slave, later thrown into prison, later rose to be in charge of Egypt, saving the same people who wanted him dead.

So today I was listening to it again, since well, my new 'hobby' seems to be spending so much time on public transport here -.-

So it came to the point where Joseph's 11 brothers were standing before him in Egypt, asking for food, and they had no idea that it was Joseph. Then Joseph's brother, Benjamin (the only one who shared the same mother as Joseph), was accused of stealing Joseph's silver cup.

So in the musical, it was this whole number where the other brothers were trying to defend their youngest brother, Benjamin.

Then it got me thinking. I really wonder what Joseph must have felt then. Like on one hand, his brothers were so eager to get rid of him/kill him. And on the other hand, they were fighting to save the youngest brother. It's kinda bittersweet don't you think? Although it probably hurt so much to be betrayed by his brothers, it's probably a very sweet scene to see them trying to protect the youngest. I mean like, if I were him, there would probably be a hint of jealousy, because no one was fighting to save him..

But ya. Nice story with a lovely ending. And if I can, I REALLY want to watch that musical again..

Prologue

Some folks dream of the wonders they'll do

Before their time on this planet is through

Some just don't have anything planned

They hide their hopes and their heads in the sand

Now I don't say who is wrong, who is right

But if by chance you are here for the night

Then all I need is an hour or two

To tell the tale of a dreamer like you

We all dream a lot - some are lucky, some are not

But if you think it, want it, dream it, then it's real

You are what you feel

But all that I say can be told another way

In the story of a boy whose dream came true

And he could be you

Homecell

Homecell was a blast!!

For the sake of those who do not attend OCF. Homecell is basically cell at someone's home, and it's usually a free and easy thing, with tons of food, fun and fellowship. And one of the nicest thing is, NO BIBLE STUDY (BS)! Don't get me wrong, it's not that I don't like BS, it's just that, with all the assignments pouring in and whatnot, it's nice to have one less thing to 'worry' about.

Anyway, I really love my cell. I think it's really a cell that was put together by God. The mix of characters is so interesting. Now that people are more or less comfortable with each other, time for step 2. MUAHAHA.

Phew

Brendan cleared customs.

Tonight I go to sleep, reminded that God is ALWAYS in control, that He is always listening to our prayers and that He loves us very much.

God is good(:

This is how much I love them

Sometimes it's out of boredom, or sometimes it's an exaggeration of some bad news, but I really hate it when my imagination runs wild and I imagine my family dead.

At the moment I still don't know how Brendan is. It sucks you know, because Brendan is probably scared. I mean, normal people would be, if they pulled aside by the police. And I don't want him to have to go through that. Worst thing is, I only would be able to see him after two weeks. Actually, that would be considered a good thing. It'll be bad if by some horrible twist of fate, Brendan gets into further trouble. Things could be horribly wrong or as Boon Hwee said, it's all fine. (I really thank God for friends like him and even for such reassuring calls).

But ya. Back to my point. I get all upset at my silly imaginations and always end up bawling my eyes out, begging God to not take them away from me any time soon.

And now I'm just going to wait by the phone until I hear some form of good news before I go to sleep. But I trust that God has this whole situation under control and that Brendan will come out fine.

It's that time

It's that time of the semester again when all the assignments and mid-sems (tests) start pouring in. Not forgetting the endless amount of readings. Plus this year, there's cell. Also the fact that travelling takes up a lot of time, whether it's to the city or to uni, and also the fact that I have to consider my family in my decisions.

So in one word: STRESS!

Because of that, I'm so thankful for homecell (no need to prepare much) and an awesome core group that is SUPER helpful. Really helps to take my mind off a lot of things.

So once I clear my mind, it's time to conquer my assignments. I shall set my goal to finish everything by this weekend so that all the revision and proofreading can be done during the week. I anticipate sleeping really late tonight. Thank God for no classes on Friday.

Hmm

I guess it's true:

As time passes, it's not that you lose friends, it's that you start to realise who your true (good) friends are.

Further elaboration shall not be provided.

Random (doggy) thoughts

Haha, please don't ask me why I was suddenly thinking of all these. It's really random.

Like I really wonder what goes through my dog's mind, or really any dog's mind in general. Like at home, my dog has been trained to sit before getting food from us. Well basically that's the only few commands she can do and so ya.. But so anyway, I totally imagined this just now..

Me: Joey, sit!

Joey (thinking): wow these humans are so easy to please. All I need to do is sit and I get fed. Life is really good and these humans are suckers.

Hahahaha. I think it's funny. Hahaha. Like how just by performing such simple tasks, we get amused and feed our pets, and the dog is happy as well. Haha. On another note, my dog is really strange. Every time my mum leaves the house (yes it probably applies to my mum only), she'll sit by the window and watch the world go by until she sees my mum home.

Such a cute/strange dog..

Many Parts, One Body

God could have made us all Sanguines.
We could have lots of fun but accomplish little.
He could have made us all Melancholies.
We would have been organized and charted but not very cheerful.
He could have made us all Cholerics.
We would have been set to lead, but impatient that no one would follow!
He could have made us all Phlegmatics.
We would have had a peaceful world but not much enthusiasm for life.
We need each temperament for the total function of the body.
Each part should do its work to unify the action and produce harmonious results.

-Florence Littauer in The Gift of Encouraging Words

The right place, at the right time

Kids, I’ve been telling you the story of how I met your mother. And while there’s many things to learn from this story, this may be the biggest: The great moments of your life won’t necessarily be the things you do; they’ll also be the things that happen to you. Now I’m not saying you can’t take action to affect the outcome of your life; you have to take action and you will. But never forget that on any day, you can step out the front door and your whole life can change forever.

You see the universe has a plan, kids. And that plan is always in motion. A butterfly flaps its wings and it starts to rain. It’s a scary thought but it’s also kind of wonderful. All these little parts of the machine constantly working; making sure that you end up exactly where you’re supposed to be, exactly when you’re supposed to be there.

The right place, at the right time.

Ted Mobsy, How I Met Your Mother

Think outside that box

Actually, what R said is true. After we get to know our personality types and even the personality types of others, we tend to stereotype people. Not only that, but we start to think within that 'personality box'. We allow ourselves to have certain characteristics only because we've been classified into a certain group.

We don't make the extra effort to get to know others after we learn their personality type, because we think: what else is there to know? We start to not look past that __ personality and get to know the person for who he/she really is.

Like people who are classified extrovert can have their quiet moments. People who are said to be happy all the time, do feel sad too. And you start to know what I mean..

Random thoughts

An overly sensitive person studying psychology isn't a very good combination. Especially once you start to read into every behaviour and then you assume that everything just seems against you.

This burden on my heart

"How can they not intervene when they witness such atrocities?"

"I think if people see this footage, they'll say 'oh my God that's horrible' and they go on eating their dinners."

It's sad because that's the truth.

When we witness all these social injustice, when we see news clips of countries that just had a natural disaster, what do we do about them? Feel sorry, maybe pray, or maybe even donate some money. But then what? We just totally forget about it and move on. But have we considered the long term effects that these may have on those people's lives? Do we realise that even though they may not be headline news anymore, that they are still suffering?

I acknowledge that it's not easy to help; sometimes we have obstacles preventing us from helping, sometimes we just don't know where or how to start.

We need to stop finding excuses for ourselves and take that first step..

Now.

2010, here I come

⁹But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

2 Corinthians 12:9

Honestly, right now, I'm starting to feel rather overwhelmed; simply by the thought of what I have to do, what I want to accomplish. I have big plans, big dreams and I don't want to give up. Even if I don't get to reach those goals, I want to have that fighting chance.

But God is good. He has been giving me that verse every time I feel down and discouraged. So I believe that end of the year, I would be able to look back and see that all that I've done is really not by my own strength, but God's. I'm going to be rejoicing throughout the year for the strength and perseverance that is given by Him. I'm not going through this alone.

2010 has officially begun for me..

Smile

Smile, though your heart is aching

Smile, even though it's breaking

When there are clouds in the sky

You'll get by...

If you smile

With your fear and sorrow

Smile and maybe tomorrow

You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just...

Light up your face with gladness

Hide every trace of sadness

Although a tear may be ever so near

That's the time you must keep on trying

Smile, what's the use of crying

You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just...

Smile, though your heart is aching

Smile, even though it's breaking

When there are clouds in the sky

You'll get by...

If you smile

Through your fear and sorrow

Smile and maybe tomorrow

You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile...

That's the time you must keep on trying

Smile, what's the use of crying

You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile

Extra Extra!!

Headlines: What is Monica up to now?

That was my poor attempt to make this post sound a bit like a newspaper article. Haha. I can't even be bothered now to continue in that 'newspaper-ish' tone. Haha. So anyhow, some updates..

• 2 more days till I get my piano!! WOOHOO.
• OCF is starting soon; I'm quite excited!!
• Uni is starting soon; mixed feelings. I'm actually excited for lessons, not excited for the huge amount of readings, assignments and then exam preparation.

And really, that's about it. Hahah. So sad, all 3 of them is about things in the future; things I'm looking forward to. In other words, there's really nothing interesting happening in my life right now. Haha.

And anyway, this is quite funny. JC Lightbulb Joke. You probably have to be a Singaporean/someone who studied in Singapore, to really understand it.

Q: How many RJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 4 whole faculties. One to design the new bulb, one to
manufacture and test it out, one to write a proposal on it and one to market it.

Q: How many HCJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: The whole school. To compete with RJC.

Q: How many VJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: The whole school. One student to screw it in and the rest to cheer and wave flags and banners to give him/her support.

Q: How many NJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They can study without light.

Q: How many AJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: They’re too busy trying to be one of the top 5 JCs.

Q: How many ACJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They’ll rather use all their money to employ YJC to do it for them.

Q: How many YJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Only one teacher to tell them what a light bulb is in the first place and to demonstrate how to change the light bulb.

Q: How many CJC students does it take to change a light bulb? (Hint: High abortion rate in the past)
A: They’ll prefer it to be darker.

Q: How many JJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Their physics is so bad that they made their macho male physics teacher cry.

Q: How many TPJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Would they even bother?

Q: How many SAJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They believe in praying for it.

Q: How many NYJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They are still using oil lamps.

Q: How many SRJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Huh, what litebarb?

Q: How many PJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Heck the light bulb lah, the principal would do something about the rightbarbs. Let’s do 300 jumping jacks for not wearing the proper school attire.

Q: How many MJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They are too busy trying to get promoted.

Q: How many IJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They are Innovians. They’ll find ways out of the dark.

Q: Who wrote all this?
A: A TJCian.

Q: How many TJC students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They think they are already very bright.

The Time Is NOW

Do you think the children in less privilege countries know that they are missing out on a lot?

Do you think the less fortunate children actually yearn for more, if they don't know what is out there?

Wait. Am I basing happiness on material stuff? Tsk me. No but really. You know when you look into their eyes, and you see this emptiness, sadness? It's really sad :(

But that aside, what can be done? How do we constantly engage ourselves with community, with the people out there who aren't like us? Is it enough to just give money, to pray for them?

Rick Warren said, "The best use of life is love. The best expression of love is time. The best time to love is now." It's time to once again engage myself with the community (and also finish my brainstorming..)

Real Community

"One key to courteousy is to understand where people are coming from. Discover their history. When you know what they've been through, you will be more understanding. Instead of thinking about how far they still have to go, think about how far they have come in spite of their hurts.

Another part of courteousy is not downplaying other people's doubts. Just because you don't fear something doesn't make it an invalid feeling. Real community happens when people know it is safe enough to share their doubts and fears without being judged."

Pachabel Rant

Unleash the classical musician inside you and laugh your head off with me.

Tick Tock

I really really like this clock, or the idea. Will someone buy it for me, or do it for me? Please??

Silver Lining

You know what's one nice thing about staying with your family?

It's when you're all alone at home, you can still be assured that no matter what, they'll come home and you can have dinner with them (unless of course we have other plans).

Plus, I don't have to be in charge of all the bills and banking and whatnot anymore. Woohoo!!

You Still Be Faithful

Like the sun that rises everyday

You are so faithful. Lord, You are faithful.

Like the rain that You send and every breath that I breathe,

You are so faithful, Lord

Like the rose that comes alive every spring

You are so faithful. Lord, You are faithful

Like the life that You give to every beat of my heart,

You are so faithful, Lord.

I see the cross and the price You had to pay,

I see the blood that washed my sins away.

In the midst of the storm through the wind and the waves,

You'll still be faithful, You'll still be faithful.

When the stars refuse to shine and time is no more,

You'll still be faithful, You'll still be faithful, Lord.

Draw Me Close To You

Draw me close to You

Never let me go

I'll lay it all down again

To hear You say that I'm Your friend

Today I started thinking;

What if we were to accomplish say 100 tasks but none of them pleases God, what's the point in that? If we were to do something that is deemed as awesome in the eyes of men and yet God is not happy, is it really worth it?

We are created BY God, FOR God.

Enough said.

Things thus far

Just a little update for those I haven't been able to talk to yet.

So anyhow, things have been great so far over here. It's freezing for summer but I guess we rather have cold than hot weather. Um, the movers have brought all our furniture so it's literally a mad house here with boxes all over the place. The thought of unpacking really scares me, especially since around August we are expected to move again. O.M.G.

But ya. Other than that things are going quite well. So. ya.