COOL people

Reminiscing the good old days. Yes those good old days. And those days would be nothing close to what it was if not for the three COOL PEOPLE!

PRESENTING THE COOL CLUB (these are all from the car wash.) We are non other than Delicia, Gerald and ME! Loo, Lim and Lee. See, all start with L, how cool is that?! It's ok don't have to be jealous.

Know why you can't see us clearly? Because your eyes are not worthy of the cool people

ok shall let you see the cool stuff. First we have shower caps!

Goggles to protect our eyes!!

Ponchos are necessary so that the cool people don't get wet!

A close up so take a good good look. And maybe one day you'll be as cool as us. But never cooler!

Not forgetting the girl I grew up with. She's learning well!

jess. del. mon.

yes that's all folks! till another time!

missing Handbells

I just watched a few of the videos that priscilla placed on the handbells blog (you can find it in my links) and I just cannot help missing handbells.

CCA registration day in sec one and I decided that I'll boldly sign up for Handbells. Somehow, something just drew me closer and closer to the booth and within moments, I knew that handbells was the CCA for me. And since then four years have passed by and I'm filled with nothing but pleasant memories.

For most of my secondary school life, I've always worked hard in handbells. My hard work was not in vain when I got into the performing group. When I got promoted to be in the committee twice. (no I'm not boasting) And as the days went by, yes, handbells is not easy. But my love for handbells and the people in it grew stronger.

And to cut to the chase, I have 'officially retired' from handbells. And it feels like a large piece of my life has been taken away. I'm no longer going to be able to ring those bells, no longer going to be able to polish them, no longer going to be able to fold and corners of the scores, no longer going to be able to use the mallets and play a song. No longer going to be a mghandbell secondary school handbells ringer. And I'M ALREADY MISSING IT LIKE CRAZY!

I'm going to miss everyone in the choir and those who just left last year. I would actually put down the list of my performances and all, but I'm too lazy. Or rather I'm just not in the mood. Because doing so just makes leaving handbells more difficult.

No one ever said that parting would be easy. Will the sweet memories be enough to make this pain go away? Oh how I miss handbells already!

20.07.2007

Today is like 20.07.2007

SO COOL RIGHT. IT'S LIKE 20072007! and some stupid lucky guy has his birthday today! but my birthday is still nicer! 050607! ahahah

ok. HAPPY BIRTHDAY RYAN! YOU ARE NOW ONE YEAR CLOSER TO YOUR DEATH! YOU'RE NOW ONE YEAR WISER.(at least I hope that's what happens to you each year. hahaha)

You may be cool but I way cooler. I'm the coolest.. Remember that!

To my best friend

HAPPY SWEET SIXTEEN JESSICA!

So cool. Can't believe I knew you for 125678909876567890 years. hahaha

Well gerald, I guess you better hurry up. So slow. Still 15 years old. hahaa. ok i was just joking. Take your time. hahaha

Read if you're ego

haha. this is a special dedication to all ego people. ESPECIALLY GERALD! hahaha.

Grade 8 Piano Exam

Today is just not my day!

10 years I've been playing the piano. Or at least around there. The point is that I've been playing the piano for a long time. This shows how my life mainly revolves around music.

And so I had my grade 8 exam today. The fact that today is friday the thirteen didn't help in anyway. And this is like how it went. I sat down, awaiting 1057. My heart was beating so loudly that I'm sure people around me could hear it. My whole body was shaking so hard and nervousness overwhelmed me. And yet, I could smile. Why? Because I knew I had put in my 110%. (or so I thought) Finally, my name was called. Nervousness, excitement, anxiousness just overwhelmed me. Slowly I walked towards my exam room. But as I stopped to wait for my examiner, I suddenly felt a rush of fear. And at that point I almost broke down and cried. I was just too nervous. And that's when the whole episode started. So I was supposed to play my scales but my fingers get on slipping off the keys. After that, I was just so discouraged that I couldn't really continue the rest of my scales. My pieces were still ok. Then sight reading. So many different keys. I think like 3 different keys and he gave me so little time to look through. And aural. Not that good.

WHICH IS SO UNFAIR! I can't believe all my hard work just went down the drain. I couldn't help but feel so disappointed in myself. I almost broke down during the exam. After I left the room, all I felt was regret, disappointment. All my hard work just went down like that. True, I may have too high a standard set for myself. But still. I really wanted a distinction and this is the first time I actually worked very hard for it. And now. It just feels so out of reach.

And today marks the last day of my handbells lessons. I'm not going to see Mrs Aw anymore till founder's day. See how sad it is. Piano gone. Handbells gone. Music has always been my passion and I've just lost 2 things that I worked so hard for.

Ok. I cannot be ungrateful. I'm thankful that I had people to listen to my disappointment. Felt good letting it out. Even though I cried each time I shared it. WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME! I'm still rather disappointed in myself. BUT I'VE THE RIGHT TO GRIEF. According to the CME talk I had today which told us that we should grief if not something's wrong. Yeah.

Sigh. Life still goes on. So yeah. I've to go study now.

God please help him. I know you have a big plan for him, but please let him see some sort of light.

Trust His Heart

All things work for our good
Though sometimes we can't see how it could
Troubles that break our hearts in two
Sometimes bind us to the truth
Our Father knows what's best for us
His ways are not our own
So when your pathway goes dim
And you just can't see Him
Remember you're never alone

God is too wise to be mistaken
God is too good to be unkind
So when you don't understand
When you don't see His plan
When you can't trace His hand
Trust His heart

Yeah that's like the first verse and chorus of the song Trust His Heart. That song, along with the song With All I Am, has been playing in my head for a long time. I guess I've reached one point in life where I've to make a decision on what I want to do after O Levels. And me and my indecisiveness aren't really helping in the decision. I'm just really confused over everything. Sometimes I feel like I'm going mad. And these songs would just play in my head, telling me that I should just commit everything to God. It's somewhat reassuring.

Many other things have been happening around me and I know many others need God desperately as well. Sometimes I just want to go up to them and just share this song but it's not really possible. Sigh.

I want to be able to help others. I don't want to sit around and do nothing. I want to at least try. And I know in the future I'll still feel the same. And now that I'm given a chance to be professionally trained to help others, I can't decide if that's what I really want to do. Why should I care how others look at me? Why should there be any discrimination? I just need someone to talk to. Someone who doesn't discriminate and who would say things I want to hear.

Guide me

Dear God please help me make the right decision that I will not regret later on in life.

Passione Finále

After many weeks of tiring practices, PASSIONE is over! Boy am I sad. When we were on stage, it seemed like only a 10 min performance for the first half. The performance practically flew by and this is like technically my last performance. THAT'S SO SAD! I'M GOING TO MISS HANDBELLS SO SO MUCH! One could actually say I live to go for handbells. Sigh.

But overall PASSIONE was a success! It was really great! The songs went well. The response we recieved was cool and my conductor is wonderful! It doesn't matter what other people feel so long as we enjoyed ourselves.

And so I want to thank these people for coming (whether I sold you tickets or not)

1. My parents
2. My brothers
3. My grandparents
4. My aunts and uncle
5. Jessica
6. Delicia
7. Esther
8. Jane
9. Lijun
10. Gerald
11. Ziteng
12. Elroi
13. Seth (and for bringing his friend)
14. Aunty Clara and Alex
15. Sarah
16. Cherilyn
17. Mag

If I forgot to put your name down, it's totally not intentional. I'm just not really thinking now. Just let me know and I'll add it in. Yeah.

Anyway, I thought I should share this. Today in church Uncle Jon came up to me and told me this is what Alex(a three year old girl noticed). She told her dad that to her it seemed that on stage, SCGS seemed to have so much more fun, that they were more relaxed. And I guess we could actually learn something from them. That performing is not all about getting your notes right and putting that (for some)fake smile on your face. It's also about having fun. It's through all these that you will be able to be more in sync with the music, that you'll actually be able to PERFORM the piece well. It's not about how they were bouncing that the three year old child found them happier, but the fact that they looked like they enjoyed themselves proved much more. Seriously, coming from a three year old, shows that there's a lot we can actually learn. So what I'm trying to say is, to be able to show the best of a piece it'll require a lot. Firstly it starts with discipline. Through proper discipline, practices will be much smoother and you'll all be able to master your notes in a shorter time. From there, dynamics and all will start to come in and at that point, you should all start being able to express the music better from there. And then start to enjoy yourselves. Handbells is not a cca that wants you to die. The music you produce is meant to be enjoyed by both you and the audience. Yeah.

And even though you may recieve response that SCGS played better. Just bear this in mind. We know we gave of our best. We may not be the best but we did our best. And that's all that matters

Well that's all for now. Till another time :)