monica + needles = ahhhh

I've said it before and I'm going to say it again. I can't stand needles!! Why must we have this vacination jab because we are going to mission trip. I'm really very scacred of that stupid needle. How I wish they will come up with new methods of giving us vacination besides needles. I kept on telling myself that I would be ok, but when people started to try scare others by emphasising on the needle and the whole procedure, I could just feel myself just break down. Like suddenly I told myself that I was not prepared to go through it and there was this sudden rush of fear. I really tried to hold back my tears, but like, the tears just kept on rolling down. It's times like this when I realise that I'm really really scared of needles. I think I teared so much that ewen and seth stopped scaring people. They were like trying to get me to calm down. So embarrassing. But I'm glad that I took the vacination with people from church cos I'm closer to them. I think if I took it with people from school. Then it would be worst. Cos at least in church there are teachers and my father was there. And yeah, the friends there are like people I know for a longer time. yeah.

Exams coming. need to go study..

Sunday School Sunday

Today was Sunday School Sunday. I must say that I really enjoyed myself except for a few stuff. But it's not nice to be remembering the sad events.. And I don't really feel like elaborating what happened. Maybe another time la..


yeah, I really dunno what to do anymore. I cannot continue being stuck in the middle anymore. Why can't you all just be happy together. There are people trying, yet there are others not wanting to do anything about it. What can I do to make all these stop? Do you all need to see my tears of confusion and frustration before all these can come to an end? Sometimes I find it so destroying to see both of you like that. And yet sometimes it just get really annoying. It really needs to stop. This cannot ever continue. The gossips, the backstabbing, the hyprocracy(spelling?) all got to stop.. I cannot take anymore of this.

no..

It's been a long time since I used to computer. or so I think. All my mum has allowed me to do is to either study or practise the piano. And I'm going mad la.

And then my mum was starting to threaten to pull me out of handbells and out of all the activities I had in church. And that was when I thought it started to become really unfair and unreasonable. My parents were the one who were happy for me when I first got promoted to the performing choir, then to part of the committee and once again I got promoted to another role in the committee. And yet now they are the one trying to pull me out of it, threatening to not let me take part in SYF. The reason why I worked so hard in handbells is because I want to play in SYF. Like if I can't play in that, then isn't handbells kinda meaningless? I really dunno how to make her stop using SYF to threaten me. It's getting kinda annoying. I thought they said they'll support me? and now they are threatening me. so exactly what are they supporting?

And for Sunday School Sunday. Ya I can tell my mum isn't too happy with all the practices I have. But it's going to be over in 2 weeks!! And not say I don't study la. Cos if I don't study, she practically nags at me until I start. And yes, she's been threatening to pull me out. And I thought I was the only one. Never thought that Jessica was facing the same problem too. Now she can't come for practice tomorrow. I think both our mothers are having a very big obsession over studying. Stupid EOYs. So so stressful. Why must Singapore education system be so tough?

And I SO SO DISLIKE MY PIANO TEACHER! I tell you, she has something against me. I cut my nails and it grew like a bit, and she complained non stop just because my hands slip. like just ONE note. and like I dunno what's wrong with her. She can go on and on about how I should play a certain style. Not my fault my other teacher taught me wrongly right. Now I'm trying as hard as I can to adjust. But it's very hard to change a habit la. And just because I didn't take grade 7 exam, she's not happy. Another person who's threatening me. She keeps on saying that if I don't try harder, she'll make me take grade 7 instead of 8. Seriously, I just can't stand her la. She's the first teacher who makes me dislike lessons so badly. And she wants me to prac everyday 2 hours? hello? me got life. And like I don't even have time to study, talk about playing the piano. Unless the neighbours don't mind me playing at midnight.

Ahhhhh. I'm going mad!!! Oh well. I better go off now lest my mum complain. Till the time comes when I can use the computer again. :)

Jeanie learning to count

jeanie learning to count

i'm so sorry jeanie. I just couldn't resist posting this

PRESIDENT STAR CHALLENGE

ok I don't know what date blogger will put this post as, but according to my clock, it's 12.49am..

TONIGHT MG HANDBELLS WILL BE PLAYING IN PRESIDENT STAR CHALLENGE!! SO SO SO EXCITING! EVERYONE MUST TAKE NOTE OF US AND DONATE WHEN WE'RE PLAYING OK?!!

that's like one of the more positive things about the event.. There are quite a bit of negative stuff too like our costume which we'll try to alter later on.. really really makes everyone look pregnant. really gross. and ya. not going to post much today, maybe after the performance.. I'M SUPER EXCITED!!!