ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..

i'm very very very stressed out.. why can't i be a bit more bold. why do i always worry about what others think. why can't i just do what makes me happy.. why do i always try to please everyone else but myself?? if this continues i'm just going to have a major breakdown.. i seriously need to work towards my goals. my dreams. yet i want to do it all on my own. i don't want others to be like telling me what to do. but yet that is quite impossible now. because my dream just slipped out of my hands and fell into two others. it's not mine anymore. how am i going to live my dream if it's not mine anymore. i can't. but i really really want it. i tried doing it on my own yet i felt so guilty cos i didnt want to share. but if i do share. then i'll be like really thick skinned. ya. so what am i suppose to do. there's nothing i can do is there.

and i really dun understand why people cannot just listen to me for once. is it very hard to meet certain criteria before i allow you to do something. i know behind my back you're complaining non stop but there's nothing i can do. there's really nothing i can do. i tried many times to allow it. but it is never done properly. so how can i allow the same mistake to be repeated time and time again. i can't.

and i really really hate it when people start changing my plans. please leave me alone for a while. i just want to scream. scream so hard that i won't have any voice left..

help.............